The Summers That Raised Us

The summers of my youth were different from the summers of today.

There were reasons for that, of course. For one thing, we only had three television channels and all they played during the weekdays were game shows and a few soap operas (that we were never allowed to watch). There were no computers, no tablets, and really no electronics of any kind.

If we didn’t go outside and play, our lives would have been very boring indeed. And let me tell you, boredom is the best thing for kids. Nothing bonds a group of disparate kids more than boredom.

Our neighborhood was full of all different kinds of kids of all different ages. Some of us were quiet and bookish, and some of us were gregarious and active. But in the summer, none of that mattered. We became a gang in the very best definition of the word. We learned quickly that we’d have to find a way to get along together or risk having an awful summer.

Our moms felt no compulsion back then to keep us occupied. Never mind the sad three TV stations and no electronics, if we said, “I’m bored” we were shoved outside and told to go play. My mom would assign us a chore if we ever told her we were bored. We learned quickly to find creative ways to pass the time.

We had a large cherry tree in our yard, better known as “The Pirate Ship”. It was a gathering place for, well … pirates! The older kids were the captains and first mates. They got to climb to the top of the tree (better known as the crow’s nest). They looked out for enemy ships (neighbor dogs, moms hanging laundry, or the milkman). None of the younger kids were allowed up there for safety reasons and the captain made sure that none of the young ones ventured too far.

The tree even had a “plank”. It was a low branch that grew horizontally and whenever someone was being rude or not playing fair, they were made to walk the plank. They weren’t allowed back in the tree until they showed sufficient remorse. It was the pirate code.

We didn’t have accessories to help us. There were no hats or costumes. Instead, sticks were swords and our imaginations took care of the rest. I still remember being part of a pirate crew and it was better than any screen time I’ve ever had.

Matthew 24:32 – “Now learn this lesson from the fig tree: As soon as its twigs get tender and its leaves come out, you know that summer is near.”

Sometimes we were allowed to walk to town together. The older kids took the responsibility very seriously. They stayed in the crosswalks until all the little ones had crossed. We always walked to the same store and headed to the candy store clutching our pennies and nickels. The older kids taught us which candies gave us the most for our money. It was high finance and we learned how to negotiate (share money and candy). We left the store with our little bags of candy feeling a sense of freedom and independence. Even if a mom came along, she stayed in the background allowing us kids the learning experience.

Proverbs 30:25 – “Ants are creatures of little strength, yet they store up their food in the summer;”

One memorable summer, my dad built a rope swing. It was a simple structure built of long 4×4’s with a rope and a knot, but to us it was a grand thing. We instantly had the most popular yard in the neighborhood. We walked around with blisters covering our palms for weeks. Unable to even hold on to the rope at first, we were soon hanging upside down and timing each other to see who could stay on the longest. We learned perseverance on that rope swing.

With nothing more than a gravel driveway and a few matchbox cars, we used to build elaborate towns. The road systems were laid out in fine detail and the city planning was epic. There were Post Offices and grocery stores, gas stations and homes. I once heard the neighbor tell my mom that he parked at the end of the street and walked home because he couldn’t bear to ruin our work.

Parents in those days resembled the adults in a Charlie Brown cartoon. They existed, somewhere on the sidelines, but they never interfered with our play. If someone went inside to tattle, they were usually met with: “Well, you must have done something first, go make it right!” We quickly learned that we had to figure out conflict resolution on our own. And, by trial and error, we did figure it out. Those lessons were more deeply ingrained in us than any we were taught in school.

1 Thessalonians 5:10-11 – “He died for us so that, whether we are awake or asleep, we may live together with him. Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.”

In this day and age, parents seem to feel that they have the burden of keeping their kids entertained. I see moms planning outings and playdates, camps and tutoring, until their children are too busy to ever just be kids.

Try a tip from the “good old days”. Pack the screens away and let boredom reign until creativity breaks through. Meet any whining with a list of chores and it will soon stop. I raised my kids this way as well and I loved watching their creative play (from a distance). And now my daughter is raising her kids the same way. Screens are reserved for a Friday night movie with pizza.

Proverbs 10:5 – “He who gathers crops in summer is a prudent son, but he who sleeps during harvest is a disgraceful son.”

At first this will seem like a harder way to parent. But soon you will have pirates, trapeze artists and city planners of your own.

What lessons will your children learn this summer? How to beat a level on a video game? Or how to get along with others, be kind, problem-solve, be creative, and use their imaginations?

You will be amazed at how much learning and creativity goes on in these lazy, summer days!