Mom, Wife, Employee, Daughter, Sister…there are lots of roles that we play in life. When you became a mom, your priorities shifted. Your life shifted. It may seem like everything changed the day you added “Mom” to the list of roles you have.
But there is one critical role that often gets put on a back burner when we become moms. The role of Friend. Julie wrote about the six friendships you can do without and I whole heartily agree that we have to be careful about who we surround ourselves with. But I also believe that if we deprive ourselves of positive friendships that we are not experiencing motherhood to its fullest.
Motherhood is isolating. Working mom, stay-at-home mom or somewhere in-between, I can guarantee you have felt alone, tired, overwhelmed and second-guessing your parenting on more than a few occasions. It’s easy to say we are too busy nurturing the lives of our children to possibly put any energy into nurturing other relationships. Trust me, I get it!
Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.
But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.
Ecclesiastes 4: 9-10
I love this verse because it equates to many relationships and roles that I play in life. My husband I truly are better together and help each other up when we fall.
As amazing as my husband is, there is one thing he cannot do. He cannot fully understand what it is like to be a mom (and rightfully so; we will never understand what it is like to be a dad!)
He can share chores, kid pick up/drop off, homework help, TLC and bedtime routines. He can be an amazing dad and husband.
He can’t truly understand the mom guilt that is brewing under every situation or the one million things that moms seem to always have spinning in our heads.
Friends are truly critical to our sanity. Those who call us Friend means that we are playing a critical role in their sanity.
Friends are there to confirm we are not crazy for having seemingly crazy thoughts sometimes. We believe them because we know they have been there too. We know they too are not perfect. When you are crying because you think you are not packing healthy enough lunches, sure enough one of your Friends will make you feel better by admitting her kid buys school lunches every day because she is just too overwhelmed to pack it. When your kid goes to the principal’s office and you feel at your wits end with what to do, your Friend will be there to remind you of the time her kid peed outside during recess.
The isolation and stress we feel as moms can feel much lighter when we have a Friend or two that really gets it. Someone who can turn our tears into laughter, often over wine. Someone who not only listens but also has their own crazy stories to make you feel like you are not the only one in the thick of it.
Here at All Mom Does, we strive to be an outlet and a community for moms. Church, PEPS, MOPS and play groups can all be awesome ways to meet other moms. Be brave, go ahead and introduce yourself to someone at the next soccer game or dance class you attend. You never know where relationships can bloom.