“Either we are adrift in chaos or we are individuals, created, loved, upheld, and placed purposefully, exactly where we are. Can you believe that? Can you trust God for that?” -Elisabeth Elliott
April has been a flustery month for my family. It began the very first week when the junior high that my older two attend had an electrical fire. Fortunately, they had just started Spring break and no one was there, but with the damage came the news that the building would be closed for the remainder of the school year. My 7th and 9th graders had an extra week of Spring break while the district tried to make plans for continued learning. We’ve suddenly adapted to our oldest now busing to the high school campus with makeshift classrooms and teacher changes. Our 7th grader now has temporary virtual learning, a frustrating reminder of the Covid years they endured in elementary school.
Amidst the change in circumstances, we’ve been slammed with Spring sicknesses and just can’t seem to come up for air. After a very germ-filled winter, it really got me down to see that Spring was starting with the same cycle. The constant flow of Kleenex, humidifiers, cold medicine, and vapor rub have been on repeat for longer than I care to think about. I run downstairs to deliver tea and take temperatures, run back upstairs to help the four year old get a tissue and some ice water, run back downstairs with a snack, back upstairs to write down what time everyone took medicine, move the laundry, grab a new Kleenex box, start the dishwasher, get dinner out of the freezer, grab another blanket, start the bath…this time I’ve had a bad cold along with my four kids which added an extra layer of exhaustion.
I can’t breathe out of my nose all night, kids wake up coughing, I’m trying to help my older two figure out their new schedules while getting my second grader to school and keeping our youngest from going stir crazy. Everyone being home and sick has led to extra arguments and bickering. The house is in disarray, bathtubs need a scrub, my back hurts, our parakeets are chirping for attention and treats, the tortoise needs his lettuce, the cats are meowing at the door.
None of these things are the end of the world, far from it. However, it’s easy to get discouraged by even the small, day-to-day situations that wear us down. We are human, things add up, and everyone needs mom. We can get weary, impatient, and frustrated at the growing list of demands no matter how much we love caring for and nurturing our children. So, what do I do when life gets a little more overwhelming than usual? There are moments when I give in to discouragement and believe the lie that we are destined to be sick, tired, and flustered forever. Focusing on the way things “should be” can lead me down a rabbit hole of negativity and nothing good ever comes from that.
Psalm 46:5 says, “God is within her, she will not fall; God will help her at break of day.” This verse brings me so much comfort. It reminds me that only with God will I stay afloat, only with His strength will I be able to feel encouraged, which means I don’t have to keep trying to hold it together on my own! Knowing this is true is one thing, but consistently putting into practice is another. When I am reaching the end of my rope and feel that frustration bubbling up, I throw my hands up and ask Jesus to take the wheel. When I’m starting to feel like things are out of control, I ask him to bring peace to my heart and home. He knows I can’t bear it alone, he tells us he will give us rest (Matthew 11:28-30), and I believe Him. I believe in His goodness and love, even when things don’t feel good.
Psalm 55:22 is one of my favorite verses, and it’s one that I’ve held close during life’s bigger storms as well as the smaller ones. “Give your burdens to the Lord and he will take care of you. He will not permit the Godly to slip and fall.”
Putting our faith in the Lord doesn’t mean things are just going to be easy, and it isn’t a single act. It’s a daily, hourly, minute by minute decision to bring our focus back to Him. To put our trust in Him over and over again regardless of our circumstances.
Lamentations 3:22-24 “Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.”
It’s a struggle for me not to ask, “Why is this happening?!” I never seem to find an answer to that question, and it takes up too much of my energy to try and solve it. As I work on shifting my focus, I try to remember a quote I once saw that addressed this exact dilemma. “If you ask, ‘Why is this happening?’ no light may come, but if you ask, ‘How am I to glorify God now?’ there will always be an answer.”-J.I. Packer
I don’t know what the rest of the school year will look like for my kids, how many more colds we’re going to pass around, or what changes are on the horizon. I do know that God always shows up. I have seen it time and time again. The discouragement we sometimes feel and the emotional load we carry as moms will be eased as we hand our burdens over to the Lord. If you’re feeling drained and like something has got to give, take courage and ask God how you can glorify him in the midst of it all.
When it comes to sicknesses or interruptions in our day-to-day lives, one of the best pieces of advice I’ve heard is to focus on our calling for that day. It’s really just putting into action Matthew 6:34. “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” It’s such an encouragement when it comes to dashed expectations, unexpected circumstances, or looming hurdles. If my kids are sick, my calling that day is to help them get better. Regardless of all the things I thought I was going to be doing or “should be” doing, that is my priority. If school has been shuffled around again, my calling is to help my kids through it and rely on God’s grace and strength to be steady for them. What are you going through this Spring? What plans have changed, what illnesses are you struggling with, what hardships have been weighing on you? There is always hope, and I pray that you will be filled with it as you make your way through this season, Kleenex and all.
“The life of faith is lived one day at a time, and it has to be lived- not always looked forward to as though the ‘real’ living were around the next corner. It is today for which we are responsible. God still owns tomorrow.” -Elisabeth Elliott
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