Swedish Death Cleaning

The problem with organizing and decluttering tips is that usually the authors suggest doing the job rather quickly. I can’t work that way. Maybe you can relate: I pull things out, I make a mess, I get partway done and then I lose steam and quit. Rather than looking better, the area I’ve tackled often looks worse than when I started.

Yet, I NEED to declutter. I’m not a hoarder, but I’ve been dreaming of simplifying my life and my home is part of that. I’m hoping that by owning fewer things, I will feel better, and my house will be easier to keep clean (I do not like housework).

It’s funny how articles pop into your life once you start thinking about something. I read an article recently that was written by a gal who was responsible for cleaning out her grandparents’ home after they died. She was, of course, sad, but what surprised her were the feelings of anger that she had.

The anger came from all the JUNK they left behind.

Because they had kept so many things (that should have been thrown out years before) a difficult task became monumental instead. Very few of the items had any monetary or even sentimental value, so why had her grandparents kept them? I could relate because I had cleaned out my mother’s house years ago. I was blessed with many helping hands but through it all I kept thinking, “Why didn’t she throw this away?”

Likewise, my husband and I recently went to an estate sale. It was held in a lovely, large home with a two-car garage and a bit of land, and there was STUFF everywhere. Both garages were full, the yard was full, the path to the front door was full and the rooms in the house were full. The owner could not have been called a hoarder per se, yet the sheer number of possessions was mind-boggling.

There were old broken-down shoes, dated clothing, Christmas trees with broken lights, etc. I walked away with a children’s book and a small shovel, because … the vast majority of the merchandise should or could have been tossed or donated years ago! It motivated me even more to get busy and go through my own house.

I heard about a book called: The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning and I immediately ordered it from the library (no, I am not planning on passing anytime soon).

Instead of being depressing, it turned out to be a wonderful little book written by an elderly Swedish lady (Margareta Magnusson). She had downsized from the family home to a small apartment. Margareta had so many great tips, along with sweet stories, drawings and even recipes. Her wise words made me believe that I could finally make some progress in getting rid of my STUFF.

My biggest takeaway was this: “Death Cleaning” is not a whirlwind kind of organization process. Margareta herself had taken two years to downsize (and she knew what she was doing). She was wise enough to know that going through a lifetime of belongings cannot be done quickly. (Think about this: even if you’re not elderly, what you own represents your lifetime too).

It turns out that “death cleaning” can be done at any age. It does not mean you expect to die at any moment. Rather, it means you are ready to simplify your life and get rid of chaos. It’s a GENTLE way of decluttering, not a mad scramble of sorting and throwing away. That really hit my heart in a good way.

Here’s some hints to get started:

First, make the decision to begin. That in itself is big. Change your mindset from gathering more to living with less. This will come into play whenever you go anywhere.

Once you are ready to begin, start with an easy area like a closet or maybe just a drawer. You do not want to get overwhelmed right away. (Never start with photographs and sentimental letters. Those things will take time and aren’t quickly sorted).

Keep a “Donate” box and a “Garbage” box next to you as you work.

Choose an area or category and focus on that only. Don’t get sidetracked.

Do not be tempted to overdo it. You will get overwhelmed. Take rest days or even weeks. This cannot be done quickly. Remind yourself that rest days are part of the decluttering process and as such are important.

Include your family members in the process. Ask them questions, “What items do you truly treasure in our home?” “What items have sentimental value for you?” “What things do you want to pass on to others?” “What items do you hope to inherit?”

Ask yourself this question, “Will anyone I know be happier if I save this?”

Give friends and family gifts from your home. A much-loved book or a piece of jewelry will be more treasured than something you bought at the store.

I love my “Buy Nothing” group on social media. It’s so much fun to give your items to people you know will cherish them.

If you need to help your parents get started on decluttering, ask them gently if you can help. Ask them: “You have so many nice things, what would you like done with them when you’re gone?” “Do you enjoy having all this stuff around you?” “Would you feel more at peace if I helped you sort some of these things?” “We could take it very slow.” This might open a conversation and get them thinking.

Invite people to help you. Believe it or not, there are people who LOVE organizing. My daughter is one such person. She comes over periodically and helps me organize an area of my home. I love it. Perhaps you have a friend who would like to help, or once I asked for help on my local social-media group and I had all sorts of people offering their services for a fee. Let them help you get started.

By taking it slow, you can turn decluttering into an almost pleasant experience. Now, every time I toss something away or give it to someone who wants it, I feel such joy. All the possessions in the world could never fill me with that same joy. And, by getting rid of dead clutter, I know I am easing the stress not only off of my shoulders, but also the stress my children would feel when I’m gone.

One last tip: I read about a couple who made a box of things they wanted to get rid of. Every time they visit their friends’ houses, they sneak an item from that box into their homes. They’ll put a book in a bookcase, a knick-knack on a shelf, etc. They’ve only been caught once. What a delightful and fun way to declutter!

And, most importantly, remember this:

Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. Matthew 6:19-21 (NIV)