Christian Parenting: How My Kids Grew My Faith

There is so much a mother has to teach her children that it often becomes overwhelming.

There are the basic things, like how to dress themselves, how to tie their own shoes, how to ride their bikes, and how to change the toilet paper roll (good luck with that last one!).

And, then you add in the big things: teaching them about God and faith, teaching them empathy and compassion, and how to survive in this crazy world.

“Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.” Proverbs 22:6

It’s no wonder that moms often feel stressed out and hopelessly unqualified for their jobs.

I felt such a heavy weight of responsibility as a young mother as I attempted to teach my kids everything they needed to know. What had I forgotten? Were they absorbing the lessons? Often as they were heading out the door I was still yelling instructions to them. “Don’t forget to say please and thank you!” “Share with your friends!” “Be kind to others!”

My kids would yell back, “We know!”

But I wanted to make sure that my children didn’t fall through the cracks, that they didn’t have to learn things the hard way, and that I was doing my job of mothering well.

Of course I did miss teaching some things and of course they had to learn some things the hard way. I felt so much self-induced stress as I watched them traipse through life.

What I failed to acknowledge back then was how much my kids learned on their own and how much THEY could teach ME.

When my son was little, I took him to see the play, “The Victor” (about Jesus’ death and resurrection). As the soldiers marched Jesus down the center aisle of the church ridiculing him for saying he was the king of the Jews, my little son began yelling angrily, “He is! He is the king of the Jews!” It was very embarrassing. But he didn’t care. It was more important to him to get the truth out there.

He taught me about brave faith.

One of my children was mercilessly bullied in school for years. I wanted to go to the school and beat up the bullies, their parents, and anyone else I could blame. My child told me in no uncertain terms to stay out of it. Watching this child march off day after day to a literal war zone taught me more about bravery than anyone else ever has.

I grew up in a gossipy house. My mom loved to “discuss” people and their problems. I used to fall into that same trap, until my daughter changed me with her kind nature. Whenever I would begin to speak harshly about someone she would defend them: “Maybe they were just tired, mom.” Or “They probably didn’t mean it that way.”

She taught me so much about grace.

I have a jewelry box full of weird costume jewelry. None of it has any monetary value. My granddaughter used to love to get the box down. She would pull out each item, caress it gently and speak about its beauty. “Oh, isn’t this lovely?” she’d ask me in a reverent whisper. When she was done she would carefully lay the jewelry back in as though it were worth millions.

She taught me to appreciate the little things in life.

I wish I had taken away a big percentage of the stress I put on myself to teach my children everything I had ever learned and instead spent more time listening and learning from them. Children have so much to teach us if we only take the time to listen.

My kids are adults now and they are still teaching me, maybe even more than I taught them. And now I have grandchildren to learn life lessons from too. I am better at slowing down and taking in the lessons now. I love nothing more than to sit and watch them as they experience life and its teachings on their own.

Proverbs 17:6: “Children’s children are a crown to the aged, and parents are the pride of their children.”

My grandkids know that they can teach Nana whatever they’ve learned. They tell me about sports teams and the latest online games. They teach me new slang words and what they mean. They come to me with the latest things they’ve realized about life and I pause and am astounded by the learning they’ve acquired all on their own.

“And he said: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.” Matthew 18:3

I am having more fun becoming like a little child than I ever did as the teacher.